Treatment and Motivation

Hello all,

Working or not working that is the question....

One of the hardest things to deal with when treating Lyme/Spirochete infection is to keep on treating the infection.

To keep on taking those antibiotics or MMS or anything that one has chosen to use.

Sometimes one sees results, sometimes one does not. Sometimes it can seem nothing is

happening or it seems to be getting worse not better.

As you can see from this page here : http://diaryoflymegirl.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/my-swelling-odema-die-off-toxins.html

and this page :http://diaryoflymegirl.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/stripy-leg-swollen-foot.html

I have also thought, when I saw those stripes appear or my feet swelling up like a balloon, in my mind I would think:

Am I going to be stuck with this forever?

Is the treatment working or making it worse?

In hindsight these were foolish questions indeed,  maybe they were a perfectly normal human reaction.

Lyme/Spirochete infection seems to affect a part of the brain that tells one not to get

treatment or that the treatment does not work or to just plain old give up because it is so hard.

I wish I could explain better why some give up with treatment, is it the clever old spirochetes playing havoc on the brain?

Or is it to do with human spirit?

I can only go by my own experience with my own children.

My Own.....

My own children have also gone through the stage of refusal of treatment and yes, each has decided to give up treatment altogether.

As a mother this was hard for me to just stand by and not be able to push them or persuade them to treat themselves.

I left it for them to decide the best course of action to take to treat or not to treat.

Their refusal with my eldest  lasted about two weeks she eventually begged to start again and she didn't stop again and has continued ever since.

She said in her words:

 "Not taking the treatment was awful the dark thoughts came back with vengeance. It  was horrible!

I got so exhausted all the time I was so tired all the time, I felt like my brain was just not working.

 I felt like I was getting stupider and I had a very foggy brain.

Then I got cramps and aches in all my joints which were very painful all the time.

I was less agile and had great difficulty in getting up from sitting down.

The  very dry eyes like I had for years before I started the MMS also came back, eyes came as did my

constant sneezing and nose irritation.

The rashes came back on my wrists, arms and legs which was so uncomfortable and itchy and drove me up the wall,

I also got white spot all over my body which again is a symptom I had before I started the MMS.

Yes when I stopped the treatment it made me feel very out of control and it was as though my

body was falling apart.

I don't know what came over me and made me stop the treatment.

 I was very foolish I will never do that again!

Now I am taking the MMS I can see that it does help, it does work and now all the above

horrible symptoms have gone and I feel I am getting better, stronger everyday.

Yes treating my congenital Lyme is the best thing I have ever done"

With my youngest well she is more stubborn than the eldest and she would not take any treatment for 2 months!

Again I had to just standby and watch (I couldn't force her)

I had to let her decide on the best course of action to take to treat or not to treat..

Well she got to the point where she begged to start treatment again and in her words she says:

"When I stopped the treatment  It was like I was so angry all the time.

 I could not control my rage, it was like something else was controlling me.

I felt so depressed and so exhausted all the time I just could not get right.

Then out of the blue I just started pulling out my hair and eyelashes!

I do not know why i did that I couldn't help it.

Now I know it was the Lyme making me do that to myself because now I have started treatment again, the urge to pull out my own hair has gone away.

What on earth was wrong with me? 

Why was I causing myself so much pain?

I became stupid,  my brain just would not work properly. I forgot how to spell simple words

like 'bed' and I forgot how to count properly.

All my joints would hurt all the time and ache.

The itching all over my body just would not stop maybe the itching caused the hair pulling.

I could not run as far as I used to. 

The insomnia was just dreadful and I just wanted to sleep all day long and stay awake all night long.

I became clumsier and would drop things all the time.

The brain fog just got thicker and thicker.

I became less tolerant to spicy foods and could not even tolerate chocolate!

Now I am back on the MMS I can eat things like spring onions and chicken Korma.

I now will keep on treating with MMS I do not want to go back to those horrible symptoms ever again”.

As a mum watching my children suffer broke my heart but what could I do?

I could not force them, i had to allow them to make their own mistakes.

They never saw me at my worst and I suppose it was hard for them to comprehend exactly what a Spirochete infection/s can do to ones body. 

They had to see for themselves what they used to be like before treatment.

Here is an image of my youngest and her hair pulling stage:

Now the hair pulling has a name it is Trichotillomania and is a condition that affects many people.

There is no known cause or cure for that matter.

All i can say is now she is back on the MMS the hair pulling seems to have stopped. I say seems to have because it can come and go.

Her hair pulling started when she stopped treatment for congenital Lyme.

This symptom has shocked her more than anything,  as she said

" What could of happened next? I dread to think!"

Maybe she has the urge to pull her hair regardless of whether she has congenital Lyme or not who knows, I have a strong suspicion that it is connected to the spirochete infection.

Yes keeping up with treatment is tough but I would say oh so worth it.

My Motivation

Ultimately my major motivation is my two beautiful children how could I possibly let them down and just give up treatment as I have come so far.

Then of course my other motivation is for myself and yes I am being self-full not selfish.

I try to find ways to motivate myself for example watching the documentary film Under our skin,

or making plans for the future, when I will be able to get a new career/job and not be reliant on others as much.

Looking at photos of myself before treatment when I was at my worst with the crutches, wheelchair, sticks, thick glasses, tube through my nose to feed me.

Then I look at photos of me now, ok, I am not quite where I want to be yet but i am on my way and I am very nearly there.

It would be ideal  to be better  before Universal Credit arrives here in the UK, at least.

For more info on Universal credit you can visit Johnny Void excellent Blog:http://johnnyvoid.wordpress.com/

Or this excellant Blog :http://diaryofabenefitscrounger.blogspot.co.uk/

I would suggest if one does have Lyme/spirochete infection and with the way the government disability  

benefits in the UK are getting harder to obtain and the fact disabled people and the sick and not forgetting 

the unemployed, are being forced to do mandatory workfare.

There is a cure for Lyme/Spirochete infections ( which could be disabling one to the point of not being able to work) whether it be antibiotics or MMS at least either will get one fit and healthy eventually You may not be able to return to your old career but hey you may be able to start a new career.

On the Lyme side of things.....

On the Lyme side of things, keep treating even once you

feel almost well, just keep going as I'm still getting better and better with ongoing treatment.

Oh, I also did a course of Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy  and that helped loads with my neuro and mental symptoms.

Depression lifted, OCDs reduced, head cleared generally.

Good luck with everything.

Lyme Girlx

**Always consult a LLMD (Lyme Literate Doctor) or your own health care professional.**

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